WK2 - the Guns Are Out

Before I get into this week's statistical report, I'd like to inform the general public that AznSitch was admitted to Redemption General Friday night for flu-like symptoms. Doctors confirmed that AznSitch did in fact have the stomach flu, though the cause is unknown. Medical experts believe that he may have contracted the virus from bacteria that was in the rice he ate a few weeks ago. He was released this morning and is recovering well.

Okay, onto this week's statistical report!

Watch out for the guns; they'll get you.

Big Bad Burgundy is out on a mission; he's powered his way to the top of the rankings, leading the pack with 337.35 points. Dick Burns, last week's hero, has dropped down to third. Safari moved slightly up to second, while AznSitch holds fort in the basement.

"What can I say?" grinned Burgundy as he straightened his double-windsor tie. "I've got the Croz; therefore, my team is the finest. It is the cat's pajamas. It is the thickest mustache. It is the hottest Japanese porn."

While his fetishes may be in question, Burgundy is on the money with his reference to the Croz. In fact, Sid the Kid put on a show this week (1G, 4A), producing over 20 points alone. Other notable gainers for the week are Stamkos (33.60 points, Sitch), and Zetterberg (30.30 points, Safari).

Here are some visuals, courtesy of the Redemption Stats Machine:

Some other notable statistics:

• In terms of total points change, Safari is this week's winner; he was able to increase his point total by 87%.
• Though he ranks last, AznSitch has the overall best points-per-games-played statistic, amassing 3.55 points on average.
• Dick Burns continues to flip the bird at his goalies, as they have accumulated a total of -9.00 points for his team overall.
• Burgundy's chance at successfully completing his MPA has increased by 12%.

"My team slipped this week," said Dick Burns. "It's my fault; I was preoccupied with bumpin' Newfie."

Wise words, Dick.